Now that elections are done with, and election observers from allover the world have not captured my case, i thought to come out and issue a notice, of intent to sue the following parties, with regard to electoral malpractice.
Issues: On February 17th, at 935pm, I received a call from a certain 077777777 asking me to vote for “omusajja owe’ kikofiira” literary – the man with the hat. The caller identified himself as mzee, and spoke with the characteristic tone of a man from a western Uganda tribe, he used many languages.
Parties to sue:
a) MTN Uganda, Board and Directors, and Staff
Case to answer: Accessory to breaking the law
As per public knowledge, all numbers beginning with 077*, and 078* are supplied and supported on the MTN Network. MTN is an accomplice to this because your Network was used to break the law. Did you really think that would be hard to figure out?
b) Electoral Commission
Case to Answer: Failure to reign in Parties, in regard to electoral laws. Failure to prove otherwise.
You set the law, and failed to make sure everyone keeps it. either you were overzealous, or understaffed. But with the ES and all extra non-ES army, you should have done better. Under-staffing? lets see, were you not on that supplementary budget? if not, that should be poor planning, either way, in Uganda, ignorance of the law is NOT defense.
c) Uganda Communications Commission
Case to Answer: Failure to monitor use of ICT in a very tight electoral race.
You guys work in a brand new building, drive around in new posh toyotas, and cant watch for people breaking the law using ICT, despite the phonetapping bill, among other things? C’mon, either you have no job description, have forgotten it, or had no election mandate. Either way, it was your job to make sure my phone doesn’t get unsolicited campaign calls/sms after official campaign hours. Did you? hardly!
d) National Resistance Movement
Case to Answer: Calling me, instead of sending someone with “airtime”.
Now, my good friends, thanks to your town yellowing attempts, it was easy to identify omusajja we kikofiira! You my dears, are guilty as charged! Really, first of all, i missed out on that ‘election commercialization’, then you beat me hands down, but you see, i had a hunch you would, so i kept the record of the call nearby, so i could get back to you. Kati, lets see, we could solve this with a HAND shake, a special assign/recruit – ment, or whatever works. I hear Mr. Odrek has plans for young people in this nation, we could meet and align visions or something like that.
So now that you are all fore-warned, am sure you will get up in arms, see you in court.